“I Vant To Be Alone”

I’m life coach and counselor Peter Winslow. Without traveling too far into the distant past, I can remember a time when I was somewhat-to-very uncomfortable being by myself, and feeling alone.

Maybe you can relate to this. If you are anything like many of my life coaching clients, the uncomfortable feeling of being alone may be a critical factor in your own success and happiness.

In time, I came to understand that for me, these feelings occurred because I didn't really like who I thought I was—and more importantly, I didn't know how to change that. It all seemed very difficult and emotionally draining. Yet with time, the tide eventually turned. As with most things, in the end it all worked out for the best.

Case in point: let’s say you've just gone through a difficult break-up with a significant other and you're ready to move on. It can be very empowering to realize that moving on, in a sense, can mean coming back home to who you really are.

If you feel uncomfortable being alone, you might remain in a dysfunctional relationship long past the point at which you otherwise might have freed yourself. When you're okay to be with yourself, by yourself and for yourself, things can and do evolve for the better. For one thing, you become more attractive to other people. Ironic, isn’t it?

Think about it… if you don't really like to be with you… why would anyone else (at least a healthy anyone else) like to be with you? In other words, if you can’t stand being with you—who can?

Ask yourself the question: am I more attracted to someone who doesn't like to be alone, or to a person who is comfortable in their own skin no matter who they are or are not with?

With this awareness in our grasp, our break-ups can signify a new beginning and lead to new personal growth. And that is a very exciting prospect for anyone.

 –Peter Winslow

Spring Forward or Fall Back

I’m life coach and logician Peter Winslow. Here’s a topic for conjecture: as you may be aware, daylight savings time cascades across the land again this coming Sunday. But… why?

We in the Arizona desert have curried favor against adjusting our clocks to manufacture another hour of sunlight during the oppressive summer season. We've got enough sun as it is. So I wonder… if we were to turn the clocks back and not forward, would we actually receive less sunshine this year?

I find it curious that jinking the clock really does alter the circadian rhythms in our bodies. Of course we get the same amount of sunshine either way—but how we feel is the real issue, and sunshine does increase serotonin levels in the brain. So do you feel better yet?

People have long speculated about the effects celestial bodies have on human bodies. Consider the fact that the planet Mars is reversing direction in the sky right now, exiting retrograde and doing a complete one-eighty against the backdrop of interstellar space. Astrologers tell us this rare event means we are about to undergo dramatic changes in matters of romance and finance. They say it's all to the good—but what do you say?

I say that just because we Zonies don't adjust our clocks to save daylight doesn't mean we won't spring forward, throttle our obstacles and make the odds come our way.

In a song titled Thick as a Brick, Ian Anderson asked: “Do you believe in the day?” Belief is truly the one and only deciding factor in the matter of “daylight savings.”

 –Peter Winslow

Substance and Fortitude

I’m life coach and success catalyst Peter Winslow. Today I have some compelling questions for you and you’ll want to consider them carefully.

First, are you a person of substance and fortitude?

Think on this for a moment. Set aside the trappings of ego, the part of you that tries to control what you believe. Really and deeply consider what I'm asking you here: how able are you to live a life of meaning while overcoming that which no longer serves you?

Next question: if you found a way to address every challenge in your life, a way that could provide stability and acceptance through every obstacle, would you use it? Of course you would.

What if every challenging situation you face—be it financial, health related, relationship, personal—could be resolved with a single asset? How much energy could you recover and redirect toward acquiring that which you really desire?

Such an asset exists, and the good news is—you will soon own it free and clear. It is called confidence.

Confidence is the key to undo the fear and resistance that have long stood between you and your dream. When this key is fully integrated and applied, your “problems” become little more than steps to ultimate power through personal growth.

The challenges that had seemed so terrifying are then recognized as the experiences you needed to identify and hone your character. Your job is to be confident, accept what your challenges offer, and calmly observe as they work their magic and then like old skin, organically fall away.

 –Peter Winslow

Carpe Diem

I’m life coach and success catalyst Peter Winslow. Today where I live we had an incredibly lovely morning, and I was certain to make the opportunity to get out and enjoy it.

Notice I did not say “take” the opportunity; I said “make” the opportunity. Opportunities are often a matter of our own making, and we who live useful lives seize opportunity as we please. We realize that opportunities abound at all times; the question comes down to when to seize and when to pass.

For example, we're frequently given the opportunity to share our own unique gifts and talents with others, and many times we choose to pass. Too often this is simply because we doubt ourselves or our abilities.

Your personal gifts are an intrinsic part of who you are and when you share them with others, you touch their lives in a meaningful way. This means that every gift you possess has the potential to bestow opportunity on someone else.

To share your gifts with others is to demonstrate an understanding of the self. Are you blessed with the talent to awaken beautiful emotions in others? Do your aptitudes reveal more practical advantages? Your natural ability to listen, to cook, to crack people up, to organize, garden, or think outside the box can greatly empower the people around you.

Our inner gifts are a means through which we can make the world a better place. It’s as simple as this: by doing what we love to do, we provide useful opportunities to others.

 –Peter Winslow

The Real You

Hello, I’m life coach and communications expert Peter Winslow. I have a question for you, and I’d like you to pay attention to your own response. Here goes: When people watch closely and observe how you interact with them, do they ever see the real you?

We may see your facial expressions, the way you address and avail yourself to people, even your body language—but what's going on at a deeper level? What are you communicating to us with your actual presence?

Are we indeed more than our bodies, thoughts, and material experiences would lead us to believe? Do we also have an invisible dimension that broadcasts our intentions to the world?

We may not be consciously aware of it, but in the midst of body and mind is the very essence of that which comprises the wholeness of being, an aspect that spiritual masters often refer to as the “true self.” Every time we interact with others in a tangible way, they say, on deeper levels of being an invisible exchange of tacit communication is taking place.

Are you aware of what you unconsciously communicate to the world? Whether you know it or not, others feel you and there's just no way to fake it. That's a good thing, as we now appear to be moving through an era where the old manipulative practices and concocted illusions just won't fly anymore. The time has come to reassess our intentions, adopt new practices and raise awareness of our authentic selves.

 –Peter Winslow